I'm sure you've been there ~ I'm standing at the kitchen counter, buttering toast, I have one kid crying because she doesn't feel good and the other giving me attitude because he doesn't want to do his chores and get the day started. And I could feel it. The frustration welling up inside. The anger. The "I'm getting ready to spew mean words" feeling.
I mean it was right there. All ready to come pouring out like red-hot lava. And in that same instant, I began to feel overwhelmed. And it's only 7:30 in the morning. But I have a busy day, and I don't feel like dealing with a whiny child. And I want immediate obedience. I should have immediate obedience. Why can't my children just always act in respect and obedience?????!!!!!!
And then I hear God's small still voice, reminding me of what I read and prayed about in my quiet time this morning. I MUST walk in the Spirit.
Penned in my journal just this morning (oh, how He knew I would need this today...)
"Father, fill me up with Your Holy Spirit. I don't ever want to walk in the flesh. I want to walk in the power of Your Spirit.
Give me an extra measure of Your Spirit as I fulfill my calling as a wife, mother, and homemaker. Father, I know my tendency to complain and grumble in my soul occurs way too frequently. Father, I pray that that tendency would be suffocated by the indwelling powerful presence of the Holy Spirit in my life."
And so, the reminder from Him lit up in my mind, and instead of spouting out the fountain of ugliness and hurtful words, I (as calmly as I could possibly muster) disciplined my disobedient son, finished buttering the toast for the sick little one, and then discussed with the first child why it is important that he learns not to be disrespectful and disobedient.
And so I did okay this morning. But, boy, have I failed in the past, and I know there will be more failures in the future. But my prayer, each morning, is that I would be empowered by the Holy Spirit so that I can fully fulfill my calling as a wife, mother, and keeper of our home.
(Pictures of the two younger kids and I sometime in spring of 2008)
Because life as a homeschooling mom (life as a mom, in general) is busy and tough, but I really believe that I, that you, could be so much more, live in so much more victory, if we just asked Him. Asked Him to fill us to overflowing with His Holy Spirit. Because the key to victory in the believer's life is dependence on the Holy Spirit. And my personal prayer for myself is that I would depend fully upon Him.
Have a blessed Wednesday!