Friday, December 30, 2011

Mentoring Our Daughters...

My daughter Lily is almost six. I can honestly say that it has been sheer joy having a little girl in the house. Lily has two older brothers, and while I love them both and find joy in them as well, it's been great to have a little girl around who desires to be my little shadow and learn from me.

Neither my husband nor I would be upset with Lily if she decided not to go to college and pursue a career. Actually, our prayer for her is that God would send her a godly husband who would support the decision to keep her at home to be a homemaker and a mommy.

Sound too old fashioned for these post-modern days?

And so as I raise Lily, I keep in mind the importance of preparing her for her future as a wife and mother. And even if she does go to college and live on her own before getting married, she will be well-prepared to survive on her own having learned important domestic skills.

So I pull her in beside me in the kitchen or at the sewing machine. I teach her how to bake. I teach her how to embroider. I teach her how to sew. I teach her how to properly set the table for dinner. I teach her how to wash laundry and fold towels. I teach her these things because I want to equip her.

I think that many young women flounder about when they leave their parents' homes. Because many mothers are no longer at home, mother-to-daughter mentoring has become very rare. Many women find themselves unsure of how to prepare a healthy meal for their family, sew on a button, or properly manage a household. And those that do figure it out, do so after sheer determination to teach themselves the things they need to know.

But the days of mother-to-daughter mentoring can be resurrected again. The trends seem to indicate that more women are recognizing and acknowledging the importance of being at home, practicing domestic skills, and then teaching them to their offspring, particularly their daughters.

And something I've found fascinating is the many young daughters who decide to stay within their parents' fold until their daddy gives them away on their wedding day. But these young ladies do not lay around all day, sleeping in, playing on the Internet, and so forth. These young ladies pursue hobbies and entrepreneurship opportunities from the safety of their home. And they see this time at home as an intensive time of preparation for their upcoming calling to care for their home and their family.

I think of Jasmine Baucham the former blogger turned author of the inspiring book, Joyfully at Home: A Book for Young Ladies on Vision and Hope. I also think of Breezy and Emily Rose Brookshire, two industrious sisters and young women who created the fantastic line of historical paper dolls.

And I have great respect for these young women. They are pursuing industrious and God-honoring opportunities all the while learning the skills of domestic life from the safety and love of their parents' homes. And this is the direction I'd like to shepherd Lily.

And keeping these things in minds, gives me purpose and direction as I parent Lily. Knowing what I desire to teach her, keeps me intentional in my mothering of her. Instead of just floating through each day, I can approach each day as an opportunity to teach and influence her.



Anonymous said...

What a very sweet post! I wish I had "known" my role in life earlier. When my daughter was small I was looking for that career! Now I have it I only wish I had those days back! But, I am doing what I can to be intentional about teaching my children good domestic skills, how to be a good wife and mother. They all attend public school or college so we have the evenings and weekends together to work on these things.

Unknown said...

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Happy New Year!
Ruth Perry Fink

Joy said...

What a beautiful post, Amber! I love all the sweet photos of your daughter learning homemaking skills. She's precious!

I'm following your blog now! Thanks for visiting mine.


Just Another Day In Paradise said...

My husband and I were talking about this today, how nice it was to see our daughters DOING things on this vacation and not plopped in front of a TV or video games. They are sewing (stuffed animals), painting (pictures), baking (cookies), cooking (homemade soup), folding (their own laundry), and sculpting (with a new pottery wheel), and leading us in prayer each night before dinner (at a table they set, and having a meal that at least 1 of them helped their Papa make- all by choice I might add). Such fun seeing their minds work instead of rotting. Thanks for sharing, and for teaching your daughter, unlike so many these days :(

Unknown said...

She is so pretty! But no fair posting these spring pictures in December!!! Happy New Year Amber and looking forward to seeing you in January!

Blair said...

Love this post! Lily is the kind of girl I want to be friends with my daughter!