Friday, June 11, 2010

Letting go...

Grabbing up the last few moments. Time threatens attempts made and peace. We reach with arms wide open, trying desperately to ignore that which beckons from the corners of our minds.

How can you fill the moments with enough moments to last the whole way through? The moments slip haphazardly through the fingers like sand. The minute hand ticks on.

The mind seems to deny the reality. The reality is good. But hard. The reality is necessary, vital, for His will to be completed. "Do hard things," the mind tries to scream through the fog.

The feelings swell up into the throat. Guilt. Leaving behind what is ours to gather up that which is to become a part of us. Will they understand? What to say to the small voices calling up from below? How to soothe? Prayers go up for His love to shower down upon the small ones.

Sunset. The feelings come harder, more persistent. The night falls upon day. The exhausted mind on the linen. Eyes closed. Mind swirling. Tears flowing forth. The heart spills.

"It can't be done," the suffocated mind calls to above. Too weak. Too fearful. Boggled down with uncertainties.

But it's there. Buried beneath the weight - the undeniable - seeping up through the softened places. The voice. He is good. He is faithful. He strengthens. He provides courage. He brings light to the dark places. He completes. He upholds. The mind finds slight ease and drifts off.

Sunrise. Light streaming in. Grace. His grace. Sufficient for us. New every morning. The light and easy joy that comes with each dawn. Dawn upon our soul. Refresh and lighten.

His words spoken to the weary soul. Giving as we ask. Giving what we need. Aware of the weight, willing to carry. Breathing hope to the downcast soul.

Light rises from the dark. The course is not yet fully lit. The end is not seen. But the end is held by the One who calls. The One who never leaves or forsakes. Peace seeps into the soul. Just enough peace to hold the dark down. Just enough. Just when needed. The way of the Maker.

1 comment:

April said...

Amber, this post was amazing. I cried when I read it. True human emotion and God's grace pulling us through it all. God bless you on your journey!